Lego Batman vs HISHE Batman
Description Warner Brothers vs YouTube. Batman is a dark, tough, serious and tragic superhero. His counterparts? Not so much. Today we have a battle between two non-canon versions of Batman. One is an alternate version of Batman in the Lego World. The other is a fan-made persona made to mock movies. Which one is BATMAN! Intro Boomstick: Everyone loves Batman. He's dark, edgy, and egotistical. Wiz: Boomstick, Batman is a serious character. The caped protector of Gotham. Boomstick: Well the Batman we're used to isn't, these two are. Wiz: Lego Batman, the bat made of bricks. Boomstick: And HISHE Batman, made to mock movies BECAUSE HE'S BATMAN. Wiz: Now these two are confusing in terms of canon, especially HISHE. So we're making some rules. The feats we use must belong these two and these two only. They can't share feats with the original Batman. We're also not scaling them to characters because, like them, those characters are different versions of original characters. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And It's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skill to find out who would win A DEATH BATTLE. Lego Batman Wiz: Ego is usually a thing that comes in lazy people. Jokes. People who think they're all flawless but in reality are weak. Boomstick: There are a lot of egotistical characters who have a large ego but are super skilled and awesome, and one of those characters is Lego Batman. You know the story. Bruce Wayne, son of millionaires, crime ally, gun, bang, butler, justice, bats, cave, and then Batman was born! Only this Batman is egotistical, trying to be cool, and fighting with villains outside of his series. ''' Wiz: Most versions of Batman have their standard weapons and skills. '''Boomstick: Versions like Lego Batman, who has your standard Bat-o-rangs, grappling hook and material arts. Wiz: There is something special about Lego Batman, however. He is a master builder Boomstick: You know how when you were a kid and you like got a bunch of lego sets and you like made a castle pirate ship in space being attacked by ninjas well Spongebob was having a light saber fight with Indiana Jones, well you were a master builder by building that ship. Wiz: Lego Batman can scan his area with his own mind and build stuff out of that area. Boomstick: With this skill, he was able to build a giant robot in little time. He's able to build a lot of stuff actually. ' Wiz: Batman also possesses great reflexes and was able to break into the Arkham Asylum and lock Joker into the Phantom Zone. '''Boomstick: But then Joker broke out a bunch of villains including Voldemort, King Kong, and The Eye of Sauron. Whom Batman then defeated...Damn, Lego has the right to a lot of people. Why haven't we had a Lego Marvel and DC crossover yet? Because they have the rights to both franchises. ' Wiz: Well, DC and Marvel are kinda busy building up their universes. DC did it by making two heroes fight and then make a team of superheroes. Marvel made a team of superheroes and then made two heroes fight. So this is the best we're going to get: Computer: What is the password? Batman: Ironman sucks! '''Boomstick: Batman was able to defend Gotham for 76 years, helped defeat Lord Business, and even defeated all of his villains in one night. Wiz: However, he does suffer some weaknesses. It took him some many tries to hit a button with a Bat-o-rang, he might lack in some intelligence, and his own "I can do everything because I'm awesome" personality sometimes leads to his downfall. Boomstick: But he was still able to do some much for Gotham, and even learned how to have a family...that's stupid Warner Bros. I came for an awesome Batman movie with fighting and action and I got a life lesson about family and friends...the message kinda made me think about my life...maybe I should go back to my 5 families in need. ' Wiz: I thought you said you had 6. '''Boomstick: HAD. Shotguns are awesome as long as you have the right things to test them on. ' HISHE Batman Wiz: The world of How It Should Have Ended is very different from most universes involving movies. 'Boomstick: It's a place where all movies crossover, there's a cafe for superheroes, and the biggest difference: MOVIE CHARACTERS ARE ACTUALLY SMART! ' Wiz: It is true. In this universe, movie characters do what they should have done to prevent disaster, and villains do what they should have done to cause disaster. 'Boomstick: Or just some random shit happens with crossovers. This is the only universe where you'll get to see Freddy Kruger playing the tuba, Snape shooting Voldemort, and Batman and Superman talking at a cafe with other superheroes. ' Wiz: Batman is a little weird in this verse. He's egotistic, trying to be cool, and fighting with villains outside of his own series. 'Boomstick: This Batman also usually questions other superheroes even if that makes him a hypocrite...and HISHE knows this BTW, it's all about self-awareness. ' Wiz: Batman has skills and weapons the canon Batman we all know and love has, like bat-o-rangs, nets, and even the Hellbat Armour which he was able to almost defeat Superman with. 'Boomstick: He even has an app to track common crooks and supervillains. ' Wiz: Batman has a lot of weird abilities actually. He's able to shrink down to ant-like sizes and teleport. He even has his own Bat-Wand, Bat-Cardboard cutout, (Note: If you wanna know how I found out he could teleport, at the end of How Batman V Superman should have ended, when Batman was crying over how Superman said Martha at the cafe, he was outside of it banging on the window and then he was back inside the cafe sitting in his both within a second, now not crying). '''Boomstick: Batman has kryptonite gas and a kryptonite spear, which he used on Doomsday. Wiz: Which brings us to our next point. Batman is able to come up with good plans and can even tell other heroes what they should have done. Boomstick: You know why? Wiz: Because HISHE was created to criticize mov- Boomstick: BECAUSE HE'S BATMAN! ' Wiz: That's his get out of jail free card he uses way too much. '''Boomstick: "How did you stop the Joker?" "BECAUSE I'M BATMAN!" "Why should I date you?" "BECAUSE I'M BATMAN!" Never gets old. ' Wiz: Batman has some crazy feats. 'Boomstick: He was able to kill Doomsday via kryptonite, caught Captian Boomerang, stopped a bullet with his teeth, could find the Villain Pub, was able to take on THE ENTIRE VILLAIN PUB BY HIMSELF, was able to PUNCH THE JOKER SO HARD, THE CLOWN TRANSFORMED INTO THE PAST VERSIONS OF HIMSELF (TBF he was punching him with the Infinity gauntlet) and even survived an explosion that DESTROYED THE DAMN PLANET! ' Wiz: All because of one reason. 'Boomstick: BECAUSE HE-' Wiz: Showed fear when Spiderman was threatening him with a gun, is very egotistical, get's into arguments every time a character says who they are, and is very distracted by women. 'Boomstick: To be fair, who isn't. ' Wiz: I'm not. '''Boomstick: THAT'S BECAUSE YOUR WIZ AND HE'S BATMAN! Wiz, you'll never be as cool as Batman. Wiz: *Sigh* And why is that? Boomstick: BECAU-' '''Boomstick: Yeah, what he said. ' Pre-Pre-fight I'd like to thank Gogeta for the thumbnail above. Pre-fight Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. '''Boomstick: IT'S TIME FOR A BAT BATTLE! Fight The Hero Cafe, 10:30 PM. ' ''HISHE: So, you shot laser beams in his eyes and now everyone hates you? Superman: Well, everyone already hated me after I survived the explosion and he didn't. ''HISHE: *Sips* God the coffee here is terrible today. '' Zoolander: DO I COME TO WHERE YOU WORK AND INSULT YOUR WORK? Superman: You're not even a chief. Suddenly, a figure walks in and passes Batman and Superman's booth. HISHE: Ha, nice Batman cosplay. '' It's revealed to be Lego Batman. '''Lego: Cosplay? Nah, dude, I'm Batman. ' ''HISHE: No, that can't be because I'm Batman. '' '''Lego: I'm Batman! HISHE: I'm Batman! Lego: I'm Batman! HISHE: I'm Batman! Lego: Let's take this outside. ' The two run outside. Once they get outside, they throw a punch and the fists hit each other. '''FIGHT! ' HISHE kicks Lego in the face. Lego grabs HISHE with his hand...claws? Anyways, he goes behind HISHE, still choking him. HISHE gets Lego off of him via and elbow hit. HISHE tries to kick Lego but the toy ducks. Lego tries to hit HISHE but the animated puppet ducks. They both throw Bat-o-rangs at each other before a rang stabs HISHE. 'Lego: HA! Got you. ' HISHE: That's what you think. HISHE pulls the rang out of him and throw it at Lego. It misses thanks to Lego dodging, but then it comes back around and hits him in the back of the head and returns to HISHE. HISHE: If you were Batman, you would have known that trick. 'Lego: Do you really think I haven't? ' HISHE looks to see the Bat-o-Rang is beeping. It then explodes. 'Lego: Looks like I was Batman after all. ' Lego walks toward the dust to see a broken cardboard cut-out of Batman. 'Lego: Wait, wha-' HISHE kicks Lego in the back of the head. HISHE: BAM! Lego turns around and hits HISHE in the face. '''Lego: POW! HISHE kicks Lego at the same time Lego punches HISHE. Both: OUCH! ''' ' The Batmans hit each other consistently well moving. Lego grabs HISHE and drags him across the floor with very bad stop-motion. Lego gets up and throws HISHE into a random window. HISHE gets up and throws several coffee mugs at Lego Batman. HISHE calls his car and the Batmobile shows up and hits Lego. Lego gets up from under the car. '''Lego: Cool car, wanna see mine. ' The Lego Batmobile shows up and Lego Batman jumps in and drives off. HISHE follows in his. It's a chase as HISHE Batman starts ramming Lego's car. HISHE uses the guns on his car to break Lego's. The car explodes. In mid-air, Lego sees numbers around the pieces of his car. He then builds a giant robot with flaming jets on his back and a gun for an arm. He shoots at HISHE Batman's car and it explodes. HISHE is on the ground and he looks up to see the robot. Lego: This is how you build like Batman. ''' He punches HISHE with his giant fist. HISHE is knocked into a building. HISHE is fine because he walks out of the building with his Hellbat suit. '''Lego: WHAT? How was he able to change into that so fast? Computer, how was he able to change into that so fast? Siri: I could only recover one answer. Because he's Batman. Lego: THAT CAN'T BE TRUE, BECAUSE I'M BATMAN! Lego fires at HISHE, but two sentry turrets come out of the ground and fire back. The bullets hit each other. HISHE: Time to show you who's boss, brickface. HISHE gases the screen of the robot and runs at it with a spear. The toy blindly hits HISHE away. The Hellbat is smashed against a brick building. The suit is damaged so HISHE gets out of it. He grabs his grappling hook from his utility belt. He shoots the top of a building next to Lego Batman man and rides up there. Lego: HA! Finally unblinded. ' HISHE back man jumps in front of Lego Batman's screen with his wallet. HISHE: MONEY ATTACK! HISHE throws money onto Lego's screen. '''Lego: Not again. ' Lego can't see so he shoots aimlessly. HISHE Batman grabs the kryptonite spear, attaches a bomb to it, and throws it at the robot, the spear stabs it and the bomb goes off. The robot explodes. Lego survives but then HISHE throws a Bat-Net on him, stopping him from moving. HISHE stands in front of one of the jets. Lego Batman uses a sharp Bat-o-Rang to cut through the net. 'Lego: Do you really think you could hold me like that. ' HISHE: Yes. Yes I do. Lego jumps at HISHE, his foot ready to kick the Batman.But HISHE turns around, holding a jet and aiming it a Lego Batman. HISHE: BECAUSE- Lego then realizes what's about to happen. HISHE: I'M- The jet starts to spark a flame. HISHE: BAAAAAAATMAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! The flaming jet, with its heat, burns Lego much that the plastic Batman starts to melt. The jet stops flaming, and the once Lego Batman is now a black and gray puddle. HISHE: And I'm awesome. '''KO! Aftermath Que HISHE Batman continuing his coffee with Superman well Zoolander uses a needle to suck up the puddle of Batman and put it in the coffee. '' '''Boomstick: I think we should know why he won. It's BECAUSE HE'S BATMAN!' Wiz: This was a close fight. Lego was able to be as self-aware as HISHE, and both Bats were able to defeat villains outside of their universe. However, there is a difference. Boomstick: Well Lego Batman faced villains that are stronger than the ones HISHE Batman faced, Lego Batman took way more time and needed backup. Backup from three friends and all his other villains. Well HISHE Batman defeated way more villains all alone without breaking a sweat. ''' Wiz: The only reason HISHE Batman didn't defeat all of them was because The Emperor knew his only exploitable weakness, the ladies. '''Boomstick: And Lego Batman doesn't really have a lady canon he can use to fight HISHE Batman. Wiz: And HISHE Batman also may be smarter. Being a HISHE character, he could always plan what he should and shouldn't do in a quick time. Boomstick: And HISHE Batman being able to completely tank a meteor that destroyed the world proves that he can probably survive anything Lego Batman could throw at him, seeing as every weapon Lego Batman is shown to have hasn't been shown to possess that kind of power. ''' Wiz: And shown a lot of times, HISHE Batman is very, very unpredictable. '''Boomstick: Lego Batman could build robots, but he couldn't assemble a victory. ''' Wiz: The winner is How It Should Have Ended Batman. Comparison '''HISHE Batman: +Stronger +Duriblity +Powers +Weapons =Inteligence -Building skills Lego Batman: +Building skills =Inteligence -Basically everything else Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:Christianthepupbot Category:'Warner Bros. vs YouTube' Themed Death Battles Category:Completed What-If? Death Battles Category:'Company' themed Death Battles Category:Video Games vs Internet Shows themed Death Battle Category:Colour Themed Death Battles